Don’t Leave Me

Once again, I am going to be left alone in boulder for a weekend, while my baby is away traveling for volleyball.  I just have to say that I DON’T LIKE IT!  It stinks when she is out of town, I don’t have any fun, I rarely get good sleep and I think about here the entire time she is gone.  I have to say that it has gotten much better than it used to be when she would go out of town, but I still do not like having her gone for the weekend.

Vegaradocun, Amexico

I’m pretty f-ing excited for Mexico. It has been really hard to have my travel partner already on a vacation, while i am left at home anxiously waiting the 5 day extravaganza in Cancun, Mexico.

Easter was nice, it was really nice being with my family.

Once again i didn’t visit the kitty enough.  I do love her, and i love going over to your parents hosue, but with the family fest this weekend it was hard to see her. Poop.

	HAYES/MOLLY	ADT	F910105216892
	BENNETT/MATTHEWPAUL	ADT

---

	AIR – Wednesday, March 26
	Frontier Airlines Flight 48 Economy
	From:	Denver Int’l Airport, CO 1:40 am, Wednesday, March 26 Unspecified Terminal	Equipment: Airbus Special Jet Duration: 3 hours and 40 minutes Meals: Snack or Brunch Status: Confirmed
	To:	Cancun Airport 5:20 am, Wednesday, March 26 Unspecified Terminal
	Seats:	22C  HAYES/MOLLY   Confirmed 22B  BENNETT/MATTHEWPAUL   Confirmed
	AIR – Monday, March 31
	Frontier Airlines Flight 45 Economy
	From:	Cancun Airport 2:20 pm, Monday, March 31 Unspecified Terminal	Equipment: Airbus Special Jet Duration: 4 hours and 11 minutes Meals: Snack or Brunch Status: Confirmed
	To:	Denver Int’l Airport, CO 6:31 pm, Monday, March 31 Unspecified Terminal

Get off my case.

We are still going to mexico. It was scary there for a little bit, but we are still going. It’s really hard to understand growing up with conservative catholic parents when you have never experienced what it’s like. The differing reactions I got on this topic made it so easy to see where my CU friends and high school friends differ.

I wrote this to my mom in an e-mail:

I know that you and dad dont approve of molly and i going to mexico, but it's something that i think will be fun and i think molly and i both need it. I understand you dont like it just being me and her, but it is not any different that going down with friends. Molly is my friend, she is my best friend and i love spending time with her. It may be immoral to you, but i live my life how i choose to. I love you, and the amazing morals you instilled in me, but we can and do differ on some levels. It may go against what you have taught me and i am sorry, but this is how i want to live my life.

VIVA MEXICO!!

My Super Hero. My runaway. My lo ve.

She is my super hero. my one true runaway friend. When i am with her its only about us. I am so happy every time that i touch her lips or her face. She is so amazing and perfect that i couldn’t possibly call her anything but my love, my soul mate, and my best friend.

Sometimes i think i treat her wrong, and i probably do. But i sure do try to make her love me. Even though i am stupid, and sometimes thoughtless and dumb, i sure do try. I try to make her life better, put a smile on her face when all she wants to do is cry. I love her for the way she laughs. how she makes me feel like i am a kid again. like i am on top of the world.

I found out some pretty interesting information tonight to say the least.

Interesting. It’s truly the only word that i could possibly chose for this type of news. Needless to say, i found out tonight that i might not have a roommate next year. My options; scotty, justin, and marty are all living toghether, and trying to find a house. I am really okay with this. I dont think it bothers me at all. I am truly the type of person that just needs my own space, and if i dont find a roommate, i am fine with that. One i have a car, and those guys have a fun place to hang out that is not my place. Just as long as it is not my place.

I want my girlfriend to want to be over at my house. To be able to sleep in my bed, and feel comfortable. To be able to bring our rocking ass kitty over here and sleep the careless nights away. But i cant. Therefore, i believe i would be perfectly fine living alone. It would solve a lot of life’s problems that i am currently under.

Back to the beginning. This picture is of the Super Hero, Molly Hayes. She was the youngest of the Runaways.

No more.

 

Smoking cigarettes. It’s very hard for me to talk about, because it is something that i am very, very ashamed and embarrassed of.

I get the urge to smoke cigarettes when I am on adderol, and when i am drunk.

STOP LYING ABOUT IT! Yea, its embarrassing, but not worth loosing your amazing girlfriend over. FUCK.

No more! No more lying.

If you get the urge, don’t! But if you do, don’t lie!

“I think we needed a good cry”

<<Iron>>

 

Sometimes its hard to show emotion, when it feels like the stress of it all has made you so numb. I love her. I love her with every ounce in me.  

You are an Emic!?!? WHAT IS AN EMIC!! 

I went to the grocery store.  I think i got you about 120% in daily iron.  Raisin Bran was the winner for the most iron. 

 

READ THIS!  Foods that are a good source of iron include: 

• liver (preferably chicken, but any small, feathered animal will suffice, nothing bigger than a pig.) 
• lean red meats, including beef, pork, lamb
• seafood, such as oysters, clams, tune, salmon (salmon has a TON of iron), and shrimp.
• beans beans the magical fruit. including kidney, lime, navy, black, pinto, soy beans, and lentils. (Taco Bell)
• Iron fortiied whole grains, including cereals, breads, rice, and pasta. (Raisin Brane), its in a new box.
• 
  
• greens, including collard greens, kale, mustard greens, spinach, and turnip greens.
• tofu
• vegetables, including broccoli, swiss chard, asparagus, parsley, watercress, brussel sprouts
• chicken and turkey
• blackstrap molasses 
• NUTS!!! (all except tree nuts)
• egg yolks (BUT NO WHITE STUFF)
• dried fruit, such as raisins, prunes, dates and apricots.

  We cried tonight.  We got into a fight, and finally broke down to each other.  It felt really good, because we realized we need to start talking more.  I definitely agree we need time where it is just us, no TV, no facebook, no kitty, no class, just us. You and me, just talking.  I think that will be perfect for us. 

GOMEZ!

so, i’ve been listing to a lot of Gomez lately and i am in absolute awe by these guys. Its hard to imagine having the imagination to come up with the inspiration and pure genious of some musicians.

I wish Molly was more into music. I think she likes listening to music, but its more of an interest in what playing and popular at the time. I’m not saying that is bad, i am guilty of this a lot of the time, i just wish she would expand her taste and be open to more music.

She loved me today, i think she loved me a lot. i loved her so so much today. nothing she said or did even got on any of my nerves. Things have been great with my love lately. I havent told her about this blog. i prob will soon.

Too much?

<<Full Plate>>

Molly has a lot on her plate lately. She is constantly busy and the few minutes that she gets to herself are filled with cluttered thoughts and stressful feelings about pending assignments. I worry about her when she gets like this, it makes her shut down and she loses focus on what is really important. She is getting sick. I hope she doesn’t have anything too serious.

Fuck dog sitting.

Blank thoughts. Feeling pretty hopeless lately. I feel like this boring repetitive life will never end. I need something to break the cycle.

Money.

To begin with change.

<<College life.>>

It’s a life that cannot be summed up by words or emotions, it is an all encompassing feeling that overtakes ones life and brings home future inspirations and aspirational goals. No where else in the world will a man be surrounded by thousands of women to choose from and pursue just one, and go through all possible emotions for a simple kiss and companionship. Add to this, the underlying pressure from all areas of life with a deep focus on independence and spiritual awakening. This is a life that must be taken with a pocket of quarters, and life that can only be described as change. Change from the person who we thought we would be. Change from the person who we wanted to be. Change from all that was known, loved, or even imagined. Change to a you, that is exactly who you want to be.

I have come a very long way in these two years of college (almost two), I start this blog with the educational goal of following my career path. I have decided I want to be a Business Systems major, and have felt passion and joy for a subject that is dull and boring to most. I have future ambitions, and a seemingly open mind to the subject. This blog is working proof, as I will soon have to create a blog and have it submitted in class.

i want to be active in my learning, and this is a good way to start.

The title of this blog is “I love you, forever” inspired after the amazing and beautiful girlfriend who i have come to love. When i talk of love, i talk of her. She is my angel, my true love, and my soul mate. I cannot begin to explain the pure joy that she creates in my life. I have lost track of that lately, but hopefully this will help to bring it back.

She looked beautiful on this night.

Miss Molly Kathleen Hayes